“I’ve never in my whole life been afraid to say publicly who I voted for.”

On the Road back to DC: Austin, Texas

Bob and Julie (by request, not their real names) are an attractive, successful, middle-aged couple living in Austin, Texas. My wife, who knew Bob in high school, suggested we meet. She thought as Trump supporters they’d be good at articulating the conservative viewpoint. They were.

What are your thoughts/feelings about the current political climate?

Bob: I'd have to answer that by backing up a little bit, and say that I had a lot of criticism about Obama's America. Not about equality movements, or gay marriage, or any of that. I didn't have any issues around that at all.

I had issues around Obama Care, mainly because I didn’t want the high taxation. I have aging parents, and I would really like to keep as much of my income as possible to care for my aging parents, as opposed to caring for...you know, having an added tax burden to pay healthcare for people I don't know. I like to be more self-directed.

I [also] had problems with Obama's America because he vilified people who experienced success in their life. If you were the so-called ‘one-percenters’ you were bad. You weren't doing your part for America. You had not adequately paid your dues through the tax rolls. I didn’t agree with that…it says that people who succeed are naturally hard at heart.

I didn’t like being referred to as a source of revenue, as the Democrats referred to us as.

I didn’t like Obama's lack of accountability. When you had Ferguson going on, when you had the police shootings in Dallas, when you had, you know, kinda the apex of ‘Black Lives Matter’, Obama didn’t stand up and say, ‘don't shoot policemen.’ And that really bothered me, because he just didn’t speak with an accountability.

And then there was a sense that America needed to be marginalized for globalization to be successful. Ok, we all agree we're in a global economy, but we don't have to marginalize America and give America away to succeed on a global basis. Shipping jobs overseas, diminishing the American brand… I felt Obama did that.

Julie, are you on same page?

Julie: I definitely feel the same. One of the things that I think we both struggled with is the whole one-percent notion, that the one-percent are bad. People make a blanket judgment about others without knowing their story.

We both grew up without any money. My parents did not have money for groceries sometimes to feed my family. My grandmother would come by with a bag of groceries and that's how we ate that night. Sometime when we knew it was really bad we'd have waffles for dinner because that was the only thing we had left.

I remember when I needed a pair of shoes and it cost $20. I couldn't get them because that was too much money. And so I always worked from the time that I was young. I worked in high school, and I supported myself.

I couldn’t go to a fancy college because my parents didn't have the money. So I went to a state school, and I paid my way. And I worked…I got a job, and I got my second job, and I had my own business, and I did consulting from the time I got married, and I made money.  I did it on my own and I saved it.

And when we bought our first house, we pinched our pennies, and the day that we had like $500 left in our checking account after we paid our bills, we were ecstatic! And we had Chinese food that night. You know?

And so, we kept working and we kept saving and the first check that we would write, after we paid our mortgage, was towards savings. And that's what we did.

And then we had kids, and we very early said we don’t really have the money but we're going to start putting money away for their college.

Bob: We never went out and bought that Porsche. We never bought that second home. We never did the big grand cruise.

Julie: No! And so for people to say you know, you're a one-percenter, you’re bad...it's offensive! It's just offensive because they don’t know.

Bob: And we took calculated risks in our careers. Working for start-ups. Some succeeded, some failed. And we worked long hours. I worked for this one start up where I'd go in on a Saturday after our son was born, and I'd bring my son with me, and plop him down in his playpen, and I'd work for 6 hours on a Saturday to give Julie a break, because I was working long hours with the start-up.

Julie: And the other thing too is that we've had to spend a lot of money on our kids because our daughter has had some issues, and we had to send her to special schools, we had to find special doctors. So we've had to spend a tremendous amount of resources on our kids. And we were happy that we were able to do that. But it's been tough.

And so, for us it's like, wow, we planned, we sacrificed; we've done all of the right things and now we're finally at a point in our life where we can take a breath and enjoy what we built. So why is that bad? And why do we now have to be responsible for everybody else? Because I thought we were responsible for our family. And for our parents.

Bob: And why should we feel guilty about where we are, which I felt under Obama—and Bernie Sanders, and Hillary and everybody else—we were made to feel because we had, as they termed it, ‘privilege.’

So, how do you feel about Trump?

Bob: When we went to go vote, Julie’s ahead of me in line, and she turned around and looked at me and said, ‘Are we really going to do this?” And I said, ‘Well what's our option? It's either Trump or Hillary. They're both flawed. But we can't go, personally, through four more years of Obama type policies, so yeah!’

So even after we voted, we're walking out, just both feeling so feel about it. But…

Julie: There's this really great thing on Facebook, the little sticker that says "I voted today," it actually said "I threw up in my mouth a little bit today." [laughs]. That's kinda how I felt. It didn't feel good, but...

Bob: But it wasn’t a vote for Trump the man. It was a vote for a fairer, more reasonable approach to economic policy and taxation policy, that is more representative across America, versus ‘one percent is bad, underprivileged is good, we're going to increase entitlements, we're going to take revenue out of your pocket and we're going to redistribute it.’

And it was also a desire to not marginalize America. Now you can say Trump himself marginalizes America 'cause he's you know, people don't think so well of him, but you have to build that brand of American back. right?

What is the brand that you're saying needs to be built back up?

Economic power, quality, military power, pride in the nation, accountability. You know the ‘make America great again.’ Wonderful! Wonderful catch phrase. Wonderful slogan. You know, let's DO make American great again. On many, many different levels. On the things that America is founded upon, which you know is capitalism, is freedom of choice, is empowerment.

Julie, what would you add?

About what I think of Trump? It will be interesting to see what happens. I think what I'm more appalled by right now is the way people are treating each other.

I've never in my whole life been afraid to say publicly who I voted for.

People are categorizing people with a blanket statement that if you voted for this person, this is who you are, and that’s wrong…that's not what our country stands for.

People are being nasty and mean and they’re so stuck in their way, and they think that it's so clear-cut that this is guy is such an idiot, and if you voted for him, you’re an idiot. And it’s not that way.

There are so many different factors that go into it. I don't love a lot of what the guys says, I don’t love what he said about women, you know. But everyone makes mistakes.

It's just very frustrating to me that there's not this level of respect, that people can’t just sit down and have a conversation and say, ‘this is how I believe and this is why, listen to me.’

I respect people who didn't vote for him. I mean I'd love to see a female president. There's nothing more I'd love to see. She just wasn't the right one for me. And it doesn’t have anything to do with her being a woman...it just really frustrates me.

It's the so-called “tolerant” people who are being intolerant, and it's not right. And it’s really sad.

Bob: And it's almost censorship by bullying.

Julie: It is...it is bullying. When people are afraid to say what they did or what they believe and why...it's bullying. And it's not ok.

What would it take to be able to have conversations that are respectful? How can we bridge the divide?

Bob: Some of my friends on social media, who I've known for a long time, keep saying the same thing. Trump supporters are racist. They're this they're that. Let's move past that, you know? Let's actually use some more constructive language about this. We’re not all racist, we're not all deplorable. I'm actually a pretty good person raising a good family, doing good things, giving to charities.

Julie: Maybe I'm too idealistic, but I feel like, in order to have constructive conversations, we have to stop categorically labeling people. And look at people as people. That all people have value. And that all people have opinions and thoughts and beliefs and that they can be different and that's okay. And that, if we want to be understood, we have to seek to understand where someone else is coming from.

We just have to have an inherent respect for people and realize that our way is not necessarily the right way. And really understand why someone feels the way that they do, and realize that they're ok for that. And it's ok not to agree.

Bob: But also stand back and recognize that there are three parts of government. So think what you may about Trump, but know that there's going to be a Congress element to it, there's a Supreme Court element to it. And know that they all kind of eventually balance themselves out, and we will probably end up making less progress, or less backsliding, depending on where you sit on the fence, than we imagine we will in this first week of the Trump administration.

And so it requires that we be patient, patient with people, patient with the process.

But a lot of what we're experiencing, we're experiencing because the political process itself only succeeds by being divisive, right? Democrats have to vilify republicans, and republicans have to vilify democrats. And no one in the middle sits back and recognizes that really what is being vilified is the extreme factions of the democrats and the extreme factions of the republicans.

I personally really dislike the conservative Christian coalition, because they give the Republican Party a bad name. I really dislike the really pro-left leanings of the Democratic Party because they give the democrats a bad label. We're really, most of us, in the middle.

“When you start shaking people’s belief systems, it’s gonna cause fear. ”

On the Road to DC: Bowling Green, KY (2)

Trump had been in office one week when we met with several of the teaching staff—and one student—from Southcentral Kentucky Community College. None of them voted for Trump, but their backgrounds gave them insight into those who did.

How are you feeling about our country right now?

Bertina: I'm pissed off. I just thought we had more decency. I came to school after the election and I couldn't quit crying and I had to stop class. And the students are like, ‘what's wrong?’ And I said, ‘there's a whole population that believes the exact opposite of everything I've been trying to teach you.’ I felt like everything I've done has just been a waste.

But I don't think it's so much everybody hates everybody as it's fear…I think the fear is what's messing with everybody so much. On both sides.

Knowing the people that voted for him, knowing people from my own family, I know it’s all fear. They're afraid of things changing…they don't like change. If it's not their way, then it's all wrong.

That’s what my mom and dad said. ‘This is the way, this is right, everything else is wrong and if you don't like it, leave.’ And that's why I don't visit. It's one religion, one belief, one idea, that's it.

And when you start shaking people's belief systems, it's gonna cause fear. And it's not necessarily that they want something bad to happen to somebody else, they just don't want something bad to happen to their beliefs, it shakes them up so much.

Theresa: I'm helping raise a child in my home now, and he's about six, and he goes to a conservative Christian private school here. He's in the first grade, and we, his mother and I, were just shocked at what happened around election at his school.

They actually taught the students—and these are first graders—about the election, and he came home with a list of notes that he had taken about the two candidates.

And on one side it was all this glorious stuff about Donald Trump and the other side it was all this [negative stuff] about Hillary Clinton. And so then, to top that off, they held an election at this elementary school, the K through sixth graders, and Donald Trump won, and they put it on their Facebook page.

But I just couldn't believe it that they would do this. And then one child apparently went home and asked his mom if Hillary Clinton killed babies.

Maggie: I guess, my biggest concern—I have so many—is about the environment. And that it's very easy to wreck things, and it's very hard to fix them. And with climate change and with things going on, we're not listening to the science on it. It's very frustrating because it's like, 'here's what happening, here's the research', and there's a lot of it and not only are they saying 'that's not true' but they're also saying 'stop trying to figure it out.' Which is just so harmful to a culture to be like 'don't even try to understand it.'

Why the resistance to science?

Bertina: Science is a liberal conspiracy, is what they think.

Jake: Yeah, and the truth that science tells isn't the truth we want to hear. So we already have this reason not to trust it, and it just takes a little bit of propaganda a little bit of confirmation bias from your in group, and your views are stronger.

Theresa:  Some of it is biblically based, and so I think that it's sort of a threat to the faith, to Christianity. Like not believing in evolution.

What responsibility do we all share for what’s happening now?

Maggie: Maybe by making the issues super black and white, and like not being able to listen to other people. And saying my way is right, your way is wrong.

Diane: I think to a certain degree, probably complacency. I mean, I have to own up to this: the Women's March was the first time I ever protested. I’m 48 years old. Why is that the first time I've ever done something active like that? So, I think, just the feeling somewhere in the back of my mind, that somebody else is gonna come in and save the day, and I'm busy, I have a job, I have my life….

Queen: Expectations. If I don’t go protest, someone else is going to do it. If I don’t go vote, someone else is going to go vote, and their opinion’s going to be heard and it’s going to reflect mine.

So as long as we're expecting stuff of other people, we don’t have to be accountable for anything. That's where I believe the world has went down so much, because instead of us taking ownership and doing stuff for ourselves, we’re expecting someone else to do it.

Jake: I think so much of it is our natural tendency to identify our in-groups, and when you identify your in-group, you automatically identify your out-groups, and when it comes down to it, no matter what, you always have more loyalty to that in-group. And I think that we should always be seeking to make our in-group bigger. ‘Pop the bubble.’ And not have these arbitrary lines that allow us to do bad things to other people, or identify them as an opposition to us, because we're all way too similar. We all want so many of the same things.

How do we move forward?

Queen: We all have to understand each other. And we have to move forward as one, because if we continue to move forword in separate directions, we're not going to get to where we need to be. We're only going to spread out further and further.

Jake: One of the things that's very important is having conversations with those people who we think are awful so that we can find our common ground and realize that we can still love each other even though we may have subtle differences in the way we feel about things.

Diane: Students do that. I have several students who wear Trump shirts to class, and other students ask them why, and they'll sit there and have great conversations and have no problems. I just sit there and let them go. There was no screaming, there was no pointing fingers. It was just a good conversation.

Maggie: I think a good strategy is for it to be face to face as well. Because through the Internet, you know, you don’t see the person’s face and you can just kind of skim what they say and take what you want from it and you don't actually have to listen to each other.

Lauren: It's easier to be mean when you're hiding behind a screen.

The teachers: Bertina (sociology); Theresa (psychology); Maggie (biology); Jake (biology); and Diane (english). Students: Queen (studying to be a medical technician); and Lauren (a grad student at Western Kentucky University). 

“What's going to happen to the country I've grown up in?"

On the Road to DC: Bowling Green, KY

At the University of Western Kentucky we met with three students, all of whom come from conservative backgrounds and, like those at the University of Pittsburgh, are involved with FeelGood: a non-profit youth movement committed to ending extreme poverty by 2030.

(Two students shared the same name. I refer to them as Lauren 1 and Lauren 2. Lauren 2 is a grad student, and spent two years in Madagascar with the Peace Corps as part of her graduate school training.)

How are you feeling about our country these days?

Bridget: I grew up in northern Kentucky, and that's a pretty conservative area…and my parents were both pro-Trump. I wasn't and neither was my brother. But I kind of didn't think [Trump] was extreme... I guess because of my parents…and just being in that environment.

But, I’ve heard from my friends in Brazil and others outside of the country and [they’re] kind of scared about what will happen. So that kind of makes me even more concerned, seeing it from an outside perspective.

Lauren 1: My whole family are Trump supporters, except for me. So even within my own house I'm seeing the tension that I also see when you get on twitter and you read stuff.

I was trying to be optimistic, but news comes out, actions get put into place, and I get more and more nervous about the state of our country and what's going to happen in the next four years or eight years or who even knows how long.

Lauren 2: I was abroad [in Madagascar] from the whole time Trump started and I thought it was a joke for the longest time…some funny joke that's going to go away.

And then people in Madagascar started asking me about Trump. And I thought, they barely know about what's going on in their capital, and so they're telling me about what's going on in my capital? So I thought I should pay attention to this, something serious is happening there. So I was really nervous when I got back to the US actually.

Is there anything in particular that makes you nervous?

Lauren 1: Watching the Muslim ban start to become a thing, and dismissing EPA requirements, is like really concerning to me because those are things very important to me. And so to watch them just get thrown out the window is like ‘oh gosh, what's going to happen to the country I've grown up in?’

Lauren 2: On the flip side of that, since the inauguration and all of this push that's been happening around the Women's March—and I got to go to the one in Nashville, which was amazing—and now there's a plan for a Science March and all of the scientists are like banding together...it's just making my heart feel so full and awesome. I now, finally, have been feeling more hopeful, but it's a scary time.

How do you explain the divide in this country?
What’s at the root of it?

Lauren 1: I think in my family it was a lack of communication and just like a little bit of difference in values and where you place respect.

I was at a dinner with my cousin who I knew was a pretty hard core Trump supporter and I was just kind of trying to avoid that situation. I was like, ‘I don't want this right now.’ And he kinda just started messing with me and it was getting really heated.

And then we managed to calm it down, and we kind of like shared beliefs, and it was like they were similar, like we both want to secure our country but we wanted to do it in different ways...it was a really nice conversation to have.

If people sat down and talked, I think we'd realize we want to kind of do similar things. But its so easy to get into that shouting match, like ‘how could you vote for such a racist man?, ‘Well how could you vote for someone who put our national security at risk?’ and like back and forth...but if you calm down there’s a lot less tension.

Bridget: I think some of it is just tradition. In the Catholic Church you're brought up be anti-abortion, and the Republican Party is mostly that, so that's the issue that you’re most likely to focus on. So a Republican candidate is pretty much who they’re going to vote for. I don't think they’re ever going to vote Democratic. So I think just Trump being part of the party now, they focus on that.

And they also watch different coverage than me, probably.

Lauren 2: My experience is that a lot of the alignment is with the party more than the person. One of my best friend's parents were really hard core Trump supporters, and I never would have expected it because they're probably some of the sweetest people I know.

But their thought was, they like the Republican ideals. They're conservative in that way, and they didn't see Trump as being part of that party really. He was just kind of the front man that was stuck up there, and once they got into office, he wasn't really going to be an issue anymore and then Republicans would have control.

But I can't separate those two. I can't do that.

What needs to happen if we’re going to have a future we feel better about?

Lauren 2: Conversations like this. Like you said, when you get people in a room and actually talking about the things they care about, you get to that different level where people aren't as concerned with which party they're aligned with and who the person is, but actually what they really want. Down to those basic issues.

Bridget: People showing more alignment with the protests, like the Women's March, and just showing what their values are, and calling their representatives and really showing where their interests lie.

When your parents said ‘here are all our reasons for voting for Trump.’ What were their reasons?

Lauren 1: My mom's explanation was always like, Democrats just give away money, that's all they do, while Republicans boost [people] up and find them jobs. She's told me that at least twice a year, since I was like five years old.

And I was like, ‘then why are Republicans against free college education?’ But she didn't have an answer. She just kind of dismissed it.

Bridget: For my parents it was about sticking with Republican values. It was also kind of money, too. Just not spending it on "give outs." That’s what they call it. Homeless people that are given handouts will just take advantage of that and kind of rely on that and they won't develop out of that. So that was one thing that they brought up a lot.

Do you think this attitude toward “hand outs” is based on experience, or just a belief about human nature?

Lauren 2: Part of it is the story that keeps getting told over and over, and if you don't have experience with it not being true, you just assume that it is. That happens a lot.

I feel like both parties, the Republicans and Democrats are going through some changes right now, and if those parties do change, how will that shift those people's viewpoints? If you're not just completely locked into a party, if the party doesn’t exist anymore the way it did, is that going to change how they think about things or relate to things?

It's just something I've been thinking about. If they don't have this idea of this ‘perfect party’ anymore, will they be more open to listening to different ideas? Or gather more information instead of just relying on what they're told by one party? I don't know if that's true, but I hope so.

"It's like we as a human race just don't know what to do."

On the Road to DC: Pittsburgh, PA

At the University of Pittsburgh we met with a group of students involved with FeelGood, a non-profit youth movement committed to ending extreme poverty by 2030. The students' responses are varied, insightful and often inspiring. 

What do you think created the divide in the current US political environment?

“I think it’s partly a blue-collar backlash. All those jobs that could be done by people are being done by machines.

“I was talking to my roommate and she said it's kind of like the whole existence of humanity has been ‘do this work, make this thing, give it to someone else for this other thing’, and that's how we live. That's what work is.

“But now, when we don't have to work to make things—we can just make them with machines—we don't know what to do. How do we give people money for doing nothing? It's like we as a human race just don't know what to do.”

“Before I moved to Pittsburgh for college I lived in a log cabin in West Virginia, in the middle of coal country. So I think I've been very well versed in Trump supporters and their ideology.

“There are certain areas on the coast and in urban hubs that are doing relatively well, but then you have places like where I'm from where the population is decreasing rapidly because there’s no work. And I think a lot of people there saw Donald Trump as sort of their savior in a way, like he was just going to come and magically restore the coal industry to what it was back in the 70s. But I don't think that they understand the details of that and the repercussions of that.

“I also think that Trump represents everything they aspire to be. Regardless of his privilege and regardless of his previous wealth, they think of him as a self-made man, and they think, ‘well I can do that too, and I want a person like that to look after me because he will help me get to where he is.'"

“I think also part of it is a cultural thing. In cities there's not this idea of self-sufficiency like there is more rural areas.

“I think about my aunt a lot. She lives in a small town in West Virginia, and she had to pay the government to pave her road. The state wouldn’t pave her road until all of the people in her neighborhood took up a collection to pay for it. And that was normal! If that happened in a city, we’d be shocked and appalled because that's a thing that governments DO! They're there to fix your potholes and there's a number you can call to ask to get your pothole fixed. But my aunt had to take up this collection for like $3000 to get the city to send out a crew to pave their road.

“That idea of self-sufficiency...it's a much more rural mindset. And it’s so at odds with the urban mindset we have.

“I don’t know. I think about that pothole a lot.”

The dynamics of this election caught a lot of people off guard. How did we lose connection with our fellow Americans? 

“In the kind of urban environment we live in, the pace we go at is like ‘bam-bam-bam-bam.’ There's no time to think about what's going on outside of our urban bubble. And when things are changing so quickly it's either keep up or get left behind. And so I think a lot of people just chose to leave behind whoever couldn't keep up….”

“There's a lot of things people don't talk about because they know it will cause conflict because people feel very strongly on both sides, so just no one talks about anything. And that's kind of an example of how that disconnect can happen.”

How are you feeling about your future?

“I feel oddly optimistic, because while I think this election was definitely not a positive thing, it brought to light a lot of issues that have really been ignored or haven't been thought of as important.”

“I'd say I feel uncertain. With what he's already done in his first week of his presidency, it's already shocking. So I'm unsure of what the future holds and what else he plans to do.”

"I think a lot of people feel like they have to match this presidency with the best people they can possibly be, so that's why I'm hopeful and energized.”

"We didn't realize there was this half of the country that we didn't see."

On the Road to DC: Philadelphia, PA 

In Philadelphia we met with a lively group of middle-to-upper-class folks. I asked how they see the current situation in our country, their role in creating it, and what are our opportunities for moving forward. Here are a few edited excerpts from their responses.

As you look at America today, how do you think we get here? What created this outcome?

"It seems to me that there's been a systematic, intentional obfuscation of reality in our country and, who knows, maybe in the world, in order to dominate and to secure selfish outcomes, rather than truly live for community."

"What I see is a lot of division. I travel out to the Adirondacks’ every year, into the backcountry of New York State. Those people are suffering out there; living lives on the edges of desperation. They've not been listened to; no one' s heard them. Instead the world’s trying to sell them things that they will never, ever in their hearts believe they can have. So, there's a disconnect."

What was your role in creating this outcome ?

"I'm consumed with the busyness of my life, in order to achieve the goals that I'm committed to. But it doesn't attend, in any way, to the disaffected of this world. And I probably have been completely asleep about interpersonal charity. Yeah, I give money for things; but interpersonal charity, I don't participate at all in that. I don't get together with disadvantaged people, and give my time and connect in that way and live in their world. I share the resources that I have. And maybe that just comes from enjoying the benefits of privilege and being able to ignore the other stuff. I think that's my contribution."

"It's almost as if, by the way things have been, by TV, we've been trained to think about things in a skewed way…to ignore ways of connecting, and not even try them. And that's how the whole situation came to be, because we didn't realize there was this half of the country that we didn't see, didn’t interact or communicate with, or ask questions of."

What's our opportunity moving forward?

"What came up for me is the concept of making contact, so that our alliances are human and not ideological. The opportunity is to subdue the ideological concerns we all have, and try to receive information and receive emotion so that we bond with each other, and create alliances that are human alliances."

"In the past, who the president was really didn't affect me. But now I see that this might be a Godsend to have someone like Trump in the presidency because there are so many of us who are getting together, really being activists, making declarations that are positive and forward and about change, and I think in a lot of ways, there's no way this would have happened if Hillary had gotten elected president. There's just no way."

"I've been joking with people that Trump is gonna bring all of together, and then he's going to claim credit for it. ‘I'm the only one that could have done this! The only one who could have brought the country together!’"

Last question: What do you feel called to do in response to this moment.

"The system through which we express ourselves is probably not going to change any time soon. So for me the thing to do is just be counted, to make sure I'm counted for where I stand vis. a vis. the system. So being more vocal than I've been before, showing up at places to be counted."

"For me, what I'm called to do is be with my community. Taking action almost has no meaning if I’m doing it by myself. I’ve signed so many petitions, made so many calls, I don't even believe they're counted let alone listened to, or read. But if I have a community I can be with, and they empower me and I empower them, then I think I can do it."

"I've heard it said that if you want something to change, you have to wait for the people who represent the status quo to just die. So I think the answer is, to instill in my two kids the values and let them and their generation figure out the means by which they accomplish the necessary goals. I think that's where the language is going to come from, that's where the messaging is going to come from, and that's where the motivation is going to come from. To create this world we want to see is to empower the young people to create it."

"What I see for me to do is love Trump. Love him. Really come from the heart and love, not so much what he does, that's really not what it's about, but really loving the human being. And it's loving all of it, you know? I just feel like there's an opportunity like never before for more and more of us to come from that really high place."

"This march has changed me."

on the Road to DC: Washington, DC

I met Sarah on the Metro heading home after the Women’s March on Washington. I asked her what the march meant to her. Her answer traced her journey from anger and sadness to action. Here are some excerpts:

“When Donald Trump won…there was this great sense of sadness and anger and disbelief… that they would elect someone to be the leader of our country who talked about ‘grabbing pussies.’ And ‘if you're a star they'll let you do it.’

“I was already against him long before that for other reasons. But I kept thinking, ‘Okay, this is the thing that will turn people against him. This is the thing. How could anybody, especially a woman, vote for him after that?

“So there's just been a lot of grief since the loss.”

"I do a lot in Houston as a community organizer, activist. I never can just sit down and not do anything…not try to change the world. So I said, ok, what can I do?

"I lead labyrinth walks. Labyrinths are a meditative walking practice. So I said, ok, I'm going to organize a labyrinth walk for peace. And it was great. It was beautiful. People came and they needed some way to let go of their sadness and so I had all the [five] different stages of grief on pieces of paper around the labyrinth—disbelief, denial, depression, etc.— and I wanted people to think about what stage they were in. That was really helpful for them to do that, really special.

"That was good, but there was still more anger happening.

"So I decided to start photographing people who represent all the groups that Trump is denigrating. So I had the Mexican-Americans, I had the Native Americans, I had the Union members. I'm up to 23 now I think. I added university students because he lied to the Trump university people."

"Everything I was doing was good, but it still wasn't giving me relief. I needed to do more. So my friend, Amanda, and I made a plan to go to the march, to come here, and I'm so glad we did because it was a really cathartic thing to do and it felt like everybody was coming together, part of a world-wide movement that was happening.

“I kept telling Amanda, ‘this is like the suffragettes, we're going to go down in history as people that were part of this movement.’

"...don’t just go back to shopping, and going out to eat...realize that we’ve got a lot of work to do."

"This march has changed me, the Donald Trump election has changed me. And I think it's good. This is all things that were there. They were all issues that were bubbling underneath the surface. So it's been very invigorating.

"I'm completely changed. And moved. To see the power of the people was really special. And to see the power in a polite way."

"What needs to happen next? That's what all my friends are saying on Facebook. I loved what Michael Moore said, I really took that to heart. He said start calling your congressmen and women every single day, seven days a week. Find out what they're working on. Start calling your representatives at the state level. Work with your representatives at the city level.

"And then, don’t just go back to shopping, and going out to eat, but to realize that we've got a lot of work to do.

"Get involved with groups that are doing things. If you don't have a support group to help carry things out, you're going to be lost. It's a tiring kind of thing to do to be an activist.

"I have a document. It's called Steps to being a Changemaker. It's like a cheat sheet on how to be an activist. People can get overwhelmed because it's a never-ending job. Even if Hillary had been in office there'd be plenty of things to be activists about. But we have to take care of ourselves. And ignite your life. That's my art project. It's called Ignite Your Life. It's all about finding what makes your heart sing. I have 52 tips for igniting your life. And one of them is vote and get politically active."

"The basis of unity in a nation is to value human life."

On the Road to DC: Washington, DC

Shortly after President Trump's inauguration ceremony, we had the opportunity to speak to two Latina Chaplains and Trump supporters, Vivian Hernandez and Desiree Bernstein. Here's an edited version of our conversation.

Were you at the inauguration?

"Yes, we were at the inauguration. We've been here all week."

I'm assuming you're pro-Trump.

"Yes. We're pro America. We're pro 'We the People.' That's the only way we're going to unite. We're not 'red state, blue state' anymore. We are red, white and blue and we are Americans first. Partisanship has to be put to the side so we can work together."

You heard his speech. What did you like about his speech?

"The fact that he felt he was turning the nation back to the people, that he was going to facilitate that and make sure there's law and order, but [also that] the people will no longer be dictated to about what to say or do. We're Christians, and we're being penalized just for deciding who we’re going to do weddings for, or bake cakes for! You have to be able to have religious or rather faith-based decisions as well."

When you say "back to the people" you're talking about back from the government to the people?

"The government IS the people, but politicians have forgotten that for a really long time! The American people gave Obama a second chance and he still didn't hear us. We are minorities. We work in the inner city, and our people are suffering.

"More people are on welfare and food stamps since he took office. I know many of the young people in the inner cities. If they are given a chance, they will make something of their lives. They don't need welfare."

So is the appeal of Trump is primarily economic?

"It's a total package. He's going to work on schools…schools are horrible; he's going to work on economics, he's going to work on defense.

"We shouldn't be ostracized because we believe in God. That's what the Pilgrims came here for, religious freedom. Ronald Reagan said 'a nation who forgets God is a nation gone under.' That's how we have felt. We have felt oppressed. No one wants to come out and speak. Today everybody was talking to everybody! It was glorious. We heard patriotic songs, songs that we’re proud of. Not many nations can say that they have written songs about God. 'God bless America. 'My eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the lord.' Everybody was singing. And the military! It was just such a beautiful day. Really, we're very optimistic.

"However, there's one other thing. We are not giving carte blanche to anyone. It's not one person that's going to turn around the nation. It'll be wisdom, and that person relying on God and His wisdom to be able to carry the oath of office through, to make sure, because everybody has to be held accountable. But we have to give him an opportunity to do something."

Do you have any concerns about Trump?

"Look, we just came through eight years with president Obama and our people are suffering. We're talking [about] the Latino community, and the Black community. So I don't have any reservations whatsoever. We're going to push together and we're going to hold his feet to the fire. We tried holding Obama's feet to the fire and he said, 'forget you.'"

On the issue of abortion, there’s a big divide in this country. How do we unite? On what basis?

"The basis of unity in a nation is to value human life. Above economics. Above inconvenience. Above even your self-interest. If you have brought a child into the world, there is a way to raise that child. And God would not have had that child conceived unless he had a destiny for that child. So each child in the womb is saying 'let me live. Let me breathe. Let me be.' And if we are concerned with the child in the womb and the elderly, then our society will be better. We have to look at this. One day we're going to be old! Are we going to create an America where they're going to give us a lethal injection ‘cause we're not any useful anymore?"

You're Latina. How do you feel about the things Trump has said that have offended some people who are Latino/Latina? How does that sit with you?

"Since he said that, he's apologized. There's a difference between someone that said something and is in great error—and I thought it was extremely offensive—and someone who continues saying that, and continues in that behavior. He's not exhibiting that behavior that we're aware of. God was able to use David who committed murder so he could have Bathsheba. So God can use an imperfect person and use him for good."

That is your hope for Trump?

"That is my hope for him. That really is my hope."

"We actually do care about and love our country."

On the Road to DC: Washington, DC

On the day of Trump’s inauguration, we met two American University students, both Muslim. They’d been at the inauguration all day holding signs saying “Muslims for Peace,” and inviting passersby to stop and chat. We spoke with one, Sarmad, a 21-year-old from Centerville, Virginia. Here are edited excerpts:

Tell us a little about the responses you’ve been getting today.

"It’s been great so far. We’ve had a majority of positive interactions with everybody—handshakes, fist bumps, high fives, hugs—from both Trump supporters and non-Trump supporters. It’s been amazing. People have come up to interview us, to ask us questions. It’s been awesome. There’ve been a couple of negatives, but we drain that out, and move on.

"We want to tell people that this is who we really are. We actually do care about and love our country. I like eating fried chicken. I love drinking Starbucks. That’s me. I’m American!

"So many religious imams, extremist imams, they’re corrupting the government and they’re not showing the real Islam. The real Islam is diversity and taking care of everybody and loving everybody. That’s what it is."

How did you feel about what Trump said in his speech about Islam?

"All we want to do is just spread our message, you know, maybe, hopefully we can even get in contact with him. Maybe we can talk to him too, since we’re so close—we’re only 45 minutes away. All we want to do is maybe educate him… That’s why we’re here. We’re here to spread education, spread the message."

"We're slowly starting to wake up and say, ‘wow, this shit really happened’."

on the Road to DC: Durham, NC (Part 3)

In part three of our Durham, NC conversation we hear from Atrayus, founder, president and CEO of the non-profit Movement of Youth, which serves the "educational and social needs of underrepresented populations." He's also currently pursuing a Master of Arts in Christian Practice from Duke University Divinity School. His inspiring story is captured in part by a powerful TEDx talk he gave in 2014.

On our current moment

I'm in Divinity School, and one of my favorite verses is from Hosea 4:6: "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge." And then in John it talks about "The truth will set you free." And I think what's really alarming is, I think we've arrived at a post fact, post truth society.

One of the truths of this country is that it was founded on white supremacy, and to not be able to have honest conversations about that is a problem. I mean, we really need to dive into how that has set up systems of inequity that have created spaces in which people of color are constantly under attack, and have been de-invested from, and have been pushed to the margins of society. So I think we need to deal with white supremacy.

The second truth has to do with the legacy of Martin Luther King, Jr. In many ways I think his legacy has been sanitized, where people focus, and I think very intentionally, on MLK as a fighter for civil rights, in particular for black folks.

"When we can societally re-determine what it means to be successful, and how success shows up, then I think we can finally get to this notion of how severely we’ve been disconnected because of it"

But what I think people forget is that he was assassinated when he was doing the Poor People's Campaign—when he was able to dial past race and say, yes race is there, but it’s also a distraction, because slavery was an economic system…it was always about money. And as soon as he started trying to align people of various races that were poor, then he became very dangerous, because he was able to unite folks.

So while I think we need to deal with race, I also think it's really a distraction. Because I think that capitalism is the root of why a person like Trump was able to get to where he is, because he represents this false model of success—the flashiness, the gross consumption and materialism that is directly connected to the oppression of other people.

So I think that when we can societally re-determine what it means to be successful, and how success shows up, then I think we can finally get to this notion of how severely we've been disconnected because of it.

On “becoming unbound”

If we can get beyond these material things and we can get back to authentic relationships with one another, then I think we'll really be in a space where we can be become unbound.

And when I say unbound, I think there are so many systems and belief systems and thoughts that bind us, that stop us from being able to show up and fully be ourselves…we're constantly in this space where, when we step into a new location, we have to extract a part of ourselves in order to survive.

I'll speak for myself. When I walk into a space—you know, so I'm black, I'm a man—I have to think about which portion of me is showing up now.

Something very simple that I'm sure folks of color can relate to, is this whole notion of ‘code switching.’ I was taught that when I get into certain environments with white folks, I have to act a certain kind of way in order to be able to navigate. And it's just something that I naturally understand. I know that when I walk into a store, I keep my hands out of my pockets, I know that I'm not going to go into secluded areas, and I'm going to look people in the eye—because I don't want to become a target.

If I get pulled over by the police, I know there are a number of things that I need to do that I am consciously thinking about that I don’t think white people really have to deal with.

And so for me, being a person in this country of color is essentially dealing with micro aggressions every single day.

On waking up

And so to get back to the original question, what does this time in the country mean to me, it's a time of urgency, but I think it's a time in which we’ve been in the midst of a long slumber, and now we're slowly starting to wake up and say, ‘wow, this shit really happened’, and we have to figure out what we're going to do about it.

Because the ways in which we've been living are unsustainable, and the amount of damage that can be done in 4 or 8 years, if that were to happen, could damn well be irreversible.

And so I think that it's imperative that those who are concerned and awake continue to learn and grow, but further, to find ways to build the types of connections we need to dismantle the current systems we have in place that are creating the outcomes we currently have.

"There's a story about my life that no conversation is going to change."

Road to DC: Durham, NC (Part 2)

In part two of our Durham, NC conversation with four young men, we hear from Charles: husband, father, mentor, banking executive and Duke University graduate. Among his siblings he's the one who "made it out." But that success carries with it certain family expectations that often feel like a strong pull backward.

On America today

Racial tension has been at, for my generation, an all time high—from the shootings to this election. So for me, as a black person, I ask myself, where does this go now that's Trump's in office? What does this mean for my community? For my sons? For the community of people I work with? And how do I actually make a difference?

I was fortunate enough to be a part of an institution that allows me to enter certain gates. But some people are not afforded those opportunities. So with this recent election and this administration, what does that mean for people who are not able to open certain gates for themselves?

Being able to have that conversation is really difficult. Especially if you don’t know what systems have been in place, before my time, to divide and to disenfranchise.

I was just looking at the new person who's the overall head of education, Betsy DeVos. When I see her inability to answer certain questions, or even take a stance on certain things, it’s extremely scary. Like, you're responsible for a trillion dollars of funding! And these are my kids that I'm thinking about, and anyone else who has kids who are going to be growing up in this system.

And it's really like disheartening. You know, you can have some comic relief, with all these different people trying to make fun of it, but if you really take a step back and look at it, it's really scary. What is this going to mean in the next 4 years? And I really believe it may even be another 4 years. And some people may say ‘no, that's crazy.’ And I'm like, ‘I don’t think you understand the power of the white supremacist system. This is not something that just happened out of the blue.’

On the role of conversations

Conversations do excellent things. I think that's the starting point, allowing space for people to talk...I think that's the first step. But I don't think conversations alone get things done.

I've been in meetings similar to this where we've had police officers, and people of the community, particularly black and Latino, and we all sat in the room and had our discussions, and we talked about the disrespect the police officers go through, and people from the community say ‘well, I don’t think that justifies people losing their lives.’ And so you have these dialogues and then the police officers go to their homes, and the black people go back to their community with all the crime.

My personal story is an example. You know, I graduated from Duke but I have a brother who's been in prison for 10 years. He just got out, can't get a job, can't get an apartment. I got another brother who's struggled with alcohol and drug addiction.

To this day, my own mother is sleeping on the couch with my aunt and my uncle, who are staying at my uncle's mother's house. And every single one of them is educated. My aunt is a pharmacist; my mom got her doctorate in pharmacy.

So we can have these conversations, which I think is excellent, just to allow people to vent their stance so that people can open up their minds to more solutions. But after I have this conversation with you guys, I'm going to go where I'm staying, and there's a story about my life that no conversation is going to change. That's just the honest truth.

On ‘pulling ourselves up by our bootstraps’

When my wife and I came back from the Philippines, we didn't have a place to stay, so we were staying with a friend of ours, he's white, and he builds subdivisions. And we had a conversation about how he and his wife don’t understand why black people can't pull themselves up by their bootstraps.

And you know, a few months later, he's in the process of possibly going bankrupt, losing everything. And he's a Christian, and he said the Lord told him to reach out to his father, who's a millionaire, and ask him for support. And his father says he will cover all of his son’s expenses for two years, until he can pay back that loan.

And it's disheartening, it's extremely disheartening, and the reason why I say that is because we had that conversation—we were very open, and he heard my perspective, and I heard his perspective, and then as time went by, my mom is still sleeping on the couch, my aunt is still sleeping on the couch, and they’re both educated, and they can't call anyone for that kind of support because there’s no one able to do anything like that. So when they screw up, their margin of error is like this [pinches fingers together].

So as soon as they f-up, it's all gone. And then when their kid gets out of prison, they look to the son that got out, and it's like, ok, alright, I have to help you. So the money that I would be saving to prepare for my kids for their future, I'm spending tens of thousands of dollars on rehab for my brother for drug and alcohol addiction.

And the solution is very unclear, outside of dismantling this system, and I truly don't know how to do that, outside of educating the people within my sphere of influence.

“What does an American look like?”

on the Road to DC: Durham, NC (Part 1)

In Durham we met with four men—Atrayus, Charles, Humberto and David—who in a wide-ranging, three-hour conversation gave us insights into worlds we have little exposure to. The conversation was so rich we’re breaking it into segments. First up is Humberto: A Latino who became a U.S. citizen in 2013.

On America today:

I think that there's a lot of uncertainty. And I think different folks feel it for different reasons. Some people are concerned about jobs, others are concerned about justice…and healthcare is certainly a concern for everyone, really. There's just a lot of tension.

I was living in Washington DC and the day the election happened, everyone was shook. You talk to the waiters at the restaurant…they don’t know what’s going to happen. Some of them are undocumented. Some, like my sister, are on this DACA program [Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals].  And no one knows what’s going to happen. It’s one thing to be concerned about your job, and it’s another thing not to know if you’ll actually be here come August.

Then the last couple months, I think we've been really divided over our image of what an American is. I mean, if you ask me what an American looks like, I feel like it could be anybody, really.

But some of us aren't viewed as Americans. And I think that in itself is a pretty interesting thing. It's like, what does an American look like? I'd be really curious if you can ask that question of other people...get into their brain, you know? Would it look like you? Would it look like me? Would it look like someone else?

So it's interesting that we are in this very tense moment right now. We don't know what’s going on.

On the right to vote:

This election was kind of a big deal for me, because it was my very first time voting as a citizen. I became a citizen in 2013. And not a lot of people really understand what that actually means…when you can vote, that’s something that you gladly wait in line for.

So what I found particularly disheartening was a lot of people saying ‘I'm just not going to vote’. For someone like me who's waited a long time to do that, to throw away that privilege, or that right, however you want to define it, is just heartbreaking.

And then you look at the [election] outcome, and you see proportionately how many people voted, and you break that down by district, and certain areas, like Michigan and Wisconsin…even break it down by counties, and then go even deeper and break it down by the census block. I mean it’s striking; it's just striking how we came to this outcome because a lot of people said 'I'm not going to vote.'

And that really hurt! Because I would have waited all day to vote, I would have stood in line. But to say that “I'm so mad that I'm just not going to vote period’? It's just...I don’t know what else to say.

On attitude towards the future:

I remain optimistic. I really do. Are we going to have some turbulent times? Yeah. Absolutely. I think this is going to test our democracy, I think this will test a lot of people.

But you know, people vote for different reasons. It depends on their priorities. So I'm very interested to see what happens as people start feeling the effects of this election within themselves.

Healthcare is one example. I'm really curious to see how you de-implement something that’s a benefit. It's very easy to give something, but it’s very hard to take it away.  Especially in rural states like KY, where they’ve had very successful programs with the Affordable Care Act. A lot of people now have insurance, a lot of people have pre-existing conditions...how are you going to take that away?

"People forget that the word 'illegal' is right in there in 'illegal aliens'."

on the Road to DC: Chapel Hill, North Carolina

By William Beare
As I pulled our car into the parking lot of our roadside hotel in Chapel Hill, North Carolina, a voice called out across the way. “You’re not coming all the way from California, are you?” 

It’s usually the large ‘Pop the Bubble— a conversation road trip’ magnet on the side of the car that draws questions, but as the miles of our journey stack up, our CA license plate will do the trick too. 

The voice belonged to Ron, a maintenance contractor for the hotel, who was standing outside under an awning in the light rain, smoking a cigarette. 

“We sure did,” I said. Ron was surprised, and a little impressed. 

“That’s quite a journey,” he said. And so I told him a little about why my Dad and I are on the road. 

“We’re just trying to make connections,” I said. “Seems these days the news we see and the people we vote for would have us believe the two sides can’t ever get along. I’ve met all sorts of people on this trip, and there's not one I haven't gotten along with one way or the other.”

"If your car breaks down and the person who stops to help you has a Hillary sticker, are you going to refuse the help?"

This seemed to speak to Ron on a deeper level, and he launched in without any further prompting from me. I stood and listened, a deeper sort of listening that this trip has illustrated the power of. I nodded along as he bounced around between philosophies and anecdotes. 

“I’m pretty close to deleting Facebook,” he said, nodding along to my point. “I mean these days it’s just politics or come to Jesus posts. I like a silly cat video now and again. It’s awful to see how angry people get about all of this. Trump and Hillary don’t think about us as much as we think about them. 

“I saw a post the other day, a friend of mine got unfriended because her friend was a Hillary supporter and my friend voted for Trump. I mean, what about your friendship? How many years have you known each other? It all goes out the door because she voted one way and you voted the other? If your car breaks down and the person who stops to help you has a Hillary sticker, are you going to refuse the help?

"I do believe in the wall. And I want the wall on airplanes and boats and rivers, any way that people get in."

“My transmission crapped out last week. Politics doesn’t have anything to do with the problems you face day-to-day. You think Trump or Hillary would give me the $1,100 I need to fix that? They wouldn’t think twice. But my buddy who's owed me fifty bucks for a while now hears about it and immediately tells me to come find him for the fifty. How should I care in that situation who he voted for?

“Personally, for me, when it came down to it, Trump was the only option. Maybe Bernie, if I had really gotten involved and out there. But Hillary, I mean it was over when Bill was in office. When you allow your spouse to cheat, that says something; if the person you marry can’t just be with you, that person should not be in the white house. 

“But why do we let it affect us? I have a friend who if I bring up my issues with Hillary, says, ‘don’t you say that, don’t talk about that.’ How can we not even talk about it?

“And I mean that same friend doesn’t like Hooters, either. I mean, it’s a restaurant.” I must have made a face here because he quickly abandoned that digression. “I mean that doesn’t matter, whatever.”  

He took a breath. I decided to wait a beat to see if more would come. I was not disappointed. 

“And you know, I do believe in the wall. And I want the wall on airplanes and boats and rivers, any way that people get in. People seem to forget that the word 'illegal' is right in there in 'illegal aliens'. This country and the help it gives its people is for us. It’s for me, for you and your Dad, doing what you’re doing. Not for the ones sitting back with their hands out saying, ‘no hablo.’ You gotta be a part of it. I served, I’m a veteran, and I’m home now, trying to get by. If I get called back, I go to war again. But I do what needs doing.”  

His phone rang then, and our moment alone was over. Work was calling, and Ron had boilers to install. We shook hands, I wished him luck fixing his transmission, and we went our separate ways. 

"Until we bring love back, this world gonna be messed up."

On the Road to DC: Birmingham, AL

We met George Rudolph, a Vietnam war veteran, at a Martin Luther King, Jr. Day celebration in Kelly Ingram Park in Birmingham, Alabama. The park is kitty corner to the 16th Street Baptist Church, where in 1963 four young African American girls died in a bomb blast planted by the KKK.

One of those killed was Addie Mae Collins, the sister of George’s wife, Sarah, who was also seriously injured. The event is considered a turning point in the Civil Rights Movement.

I walk up to George, whom I’ve never met, and ask if he’ll talk to me. His response is instantly friendly. I tell him about our 'conversation road trip', and ask him his thoughts on Donald Trump.

“Well...he won the electoral vote; that's what he won. He didn't win the popular vote. Hillary got that. [So] he might be president...but he ain't none a’ my president.

“Man, any time you get up on a table and say you can grab a woman in her private parts...what give you the right to do that? But people still voted for him. So, my thing is, I wish him well, but he ain't none a’ my president.

“When Obama was in there in the White House, man he had class! I ain't never seen him all riled up, gettin' mad or hollerin' at somebody. This man [Trump], hell, he gonna be known for that if things don’t go his way! See, he's used to havin’ his way. He got all that money.”

George walks us toward the church, and toward a memorial sculpture called “The four spirits”—a tribute to the four girls killed in the '63 bombing. 

"You know about that church over there? Them girls got killed. One of them girls was my wife's sister. Let me show you, I'm gonna show it to you.

He points to the statue of the girl sitting on the bench.

“That's Addie Mae. That's my wife's sister right there. “

Then he points to a photograph embedded in a stone bench, also part of the memorial.

“That picture you see on the end, right here? That's my wife. Her name's Sarah. My wife survived that bombing. She was in the church that morning when that bomb went off and four girls got killed. She lost an eye in that bombing, but she survived it. Now she suffers with PTSD, just like I do from Vietnam.

“See, that was a powerful bomb. I was in church, I was in church on the south side, and when I heard that explosion, man, I said 'God, no!' And later on I thought, 'how could anybody live through that?' But she did; Sarah lived through it.

“There's a lot of history down in this park. You see in this park, this is where...I don't know if you heard of Bull Connor. He was the chief of police. He was the one that was givin' the orders, turnin' the dogs loose, and the fire hoses. He's ridin' around in a white tank, turnin' them dogs on men.

"A lot of history here in this park, and over there in that church.

"This is a historical landmark. President just signed it, it says 'Historical Landmark'. You are here in a historical place. If these grounds could talk...a lot of people...a lot of blood was shed here.”

I ask him what advice he has for people who disagree, to help them come together.

"Well, they've got to have love, see? If you ain't got no love in your hearts… you got to have love.

“I can't hate you for your color. You can't hate me for my color. See, the Creator don't look at color. He look at that heart.

“We must love each other. Until we bring that love back, this world gonna be messed up. You got to have love."

"I got to love you. Then I got to forgive you. You see, that's another thing. We got to have forgiveness. You hear me? You got to have forgiveness."

"Walkin' around hatin' you, man...how can I hate you and say I love Him who I've never seen? You got to have love, that's what's lackin'.

"People don't have love in their hearts. They just got hatred. All this killin' is senseless, like right here in Birmingham…we set a record with homicide, man. People just doin' this killin.' And it's wrong.

"When I went to Vietnam, I didn't like that. I didn't volunteer for that. The only thing I know is I got a piece of paper saying where I got to go."

George turns away to hide his emotion.

"You see that's another thing. What is war good for? War ain't good for nothin'. Sendin’ some young man over there in Iraq or Afghanistan...what is the purpose? What are you accomplishing, being over there? Nothing. Then when you lose a loved one, then that family is messed up.  They lost a son or daughter.

"So we got to have love, man. We got to have a whole lotta love. That's something I think Trump is lacking. You know he got that money, and the arrogance, and he figure it'll be his way, where he gets to say 'you fired!'

“It's gonna be rough, man! But I ain’t gonna look at that inauguration. I ain’t even gonna look at it. There's a lot of hate goin’ on there. The KKK ain’t never went nowhere, but they comin’ out now, 'cause you see Trump is talkin' their language.

"Like I say, that man’s in charge (points upwards). The president elect can't do no more than what He let him do. 'Cause that money can’t save him. You can't take that money with you. That money there to help people. You can't put it in that casket."

Our conversation starts coming to a close, as other people call to get George's attention.

"You say you gonna drive up there? So you gonna be there for the actual inauguration, that day, you'll be there? That's gonna be something to see. Well, you be careful, you and your son."

We end the conversation with a hug, and I thank him for being so responsive to me when I walked up to talk.

“Yeah, that's what it's all about.”

Now, in writing up this conversation, I'm reminded of a quote from Maya Angelou:

"Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time."

"I support the wall."

On the Road to DC: Natchitoches, LA

By William Beare

Chris Arnade, photographer and storyteller, did a piece not long ago on the role of McDonald’s restaurants as small-town community centers. It was a series of photos and quoted snippets from people in struggling economic circumstances who had, despite geographic and social differences, all turned to McDonald’s as a place to gather. The concept spoke to me, especially in the context of my own conversation mission. After more than a week on the road to DC, our sampling of the country still felt monochromatic, and we wanted to get further outside the bubble we were purportedly popping.

And so, in that spirit, we pulled off I-49 at Natchitoches, Louisiana to look for some lunch, and some spontaneous conversation. The immediate off-highway options were the usual fare, but nestled in between a Wendy’s and a Popeyes, in a town with a very small Latino community, was a newly opened family-owned Mexican restaurant called El Patio. Curious, we poked our heads inside.

Our waitress’ name was Edie, a young thirty-something who had come to the US from Venezuela, and we struck up a conversation in Spanish, as she had only recently moved to Louisiana from Miami and was still learning English. She helped me find what I was looking for on the menu, and we exchanged some pleasantries.

By the time we were done with our meal, the place had cleared out and I felt less guilty about taking up Edie’s time. Assuming I could predict her answer, I asked in Spanish, “So what do you think about the political climate here? If and when you think about it?”

She clarified, “You mean, what do I think about Trump?”

“Yeah, sure. Let’s start there.”

She looked left, looked right, and then leaned in so as not to be overheard by any of her Mexican co-workers. Then she stunned me. She told me if she wasn’t on a visa and could have voted, she would have voted for Trump.

“Okay. Interesting. And in a word, why?”

“He seems like the best choice economically.”

“And why is that?” I asked.

She looked miffed, as if my question didn’t read as sincere. “Well it’s Trump. He’s a very successful businessman.”

I asked Edie about the immigration issue, expecting to hear a concession on the subject, but again, she popped my bubble.

“The wall seems like a good idea. I support the wall. A country has the right to know who enters its borders. I’m here legally. I have my papers, I stood in line. So did my brother. People are coming in from Mexico illegally all the time. Why should there be a shortcut there? In Venezuela, we want to know who is coming in to our country. It’s fair for the United States to want the same.”

“I see. And what do you think about Trump, the man?”

“A little too aggressive, in my opinion. Not very presidential. Almost like a dog, always barking and trying to fight.”

“But you don’t mind that?”

“I mind, I think some of the things he says are wrong, but things he plans to do could be very good. People voted for him to make the economy better, and he knows business.

“But ‘the lady’ [Hillary] was no good. She never spoke to me. She never touched me. She was everything I think of when I picture a smiling, typical white lady.”

She went on for a short while on that subject, hitting on some of the favorite digs against Hillary Clinton—specifically that she was disconnected from the struggle of the working class—all while referring to her as “la señora,” or simply “the lady.” But Edie had work to do and we had taken up enough of her time, so I thanked her for sharing her thoughts with me and wished her well.

We said our goodbyes, but before leaving she asked me a question in return. She wanted to know what we thought of Trump, and by ‘we’ I took her to mean all Americans. “We’re divided,” I said.

“Well, that much is clear,” she replied.

"Is Hillary in jail?"

on the road to DC: somewhere in Louisiana

On the way to New Orleans, we stop at a gas station. My son Will runs in to get me a cup of coffee while I sit in the car, windows down. A local comes up, looking every bit my Louisiana backwater stereotype. He reads our car magnet, and pokes his head through the passenger side window, smiling.

"You on a road trip?" he drawls.

"Yes, a conversation road trip," I reply. "We're driving to DC to attend Trump's inauguration and stopping to talk to folks along the way. We wanted to get out of California to hear what people are thinking."

"You from California?" he asks, surprised.

"Yep."

"You hunt and fish out there in California?"

The question is not what I expect. "Yeah," I say. "Some people do."

"What do they fish for?"

"Salmon, Trout, " I say, naming the only two kinds of fish I can think of on short notice.

"You hunt and fish?" I ask.

"Oh yeah," he says. "Huntin' and fishin' is all we do."

There's a pause.

"I have a cousin in California," he says suddenly. "He's gay. Runs a hair salon out there. A hair salon. Crazy son of a bitch."

I get a sense he wants to talk. I lean in. "So, how are you feeling about the country? You feeling pretty good? You like Trump?"

"Yeah," he says. "You?"

"Not so much," I reply. "But I'm learning to appreciate the other perspective."

Suddenly his attitude shifts. "I hate the guy," he confides. "Crazy son of a bitch. Why does a billionaire want to be president? What's he gonna do for us...other than start a war?"

I did not expect this. "Yeah," I agree. "It's getting a little scary."

"He's real scary. Crazy son of a bitch."

Will comes back to the car with the coffee. It's time to go, but the man has one more question. He asks it like someone who's suspicious of what he's heard and now wants to know the truth.

"Is Hillary in jail?" he asks softly.

"No" I say, "She's not in jail."

"It's just that I saw a picture of her, and she was behind bars, in jail."

"No," says Will. "That's a fake photograph."

"It's a fake?" he says.

"Yeah, people do that because they don't want us to get along. But we do get along, don't we?" says Will, as he puts out his hand.

The man shakes it and smiles.

We drive away.

"We're at the risk point."

On the Road to DC: Boulder, CO (2)

Frank Alexander is director of the Boulder County Department of Housing and Human Services—an agency whose work is often celebrated by the left and impugned by the right. In a state where 80% of the local elected officials at the county commissioner level are Republicans and 20% are Democrats, Frank’s department has had to bridge these two different mindsets. Here are some excerpts describing their approach.

Reducing separation
"We look at things like welfare as a handout because we're so attached as humans to our concept of being better than the other. We're so attached to our sense of superiority—we're intellectually superior; we’re financially superior—that we see people who are struggling as inferior. And so we look for the simple explanation that justifies our sense of superiority.

"If we continue to justify our own sense of superiority by demonizing the other, the separation between ‘us and them’ grows, and our ability to justify decisions that will harm the other increases because we don’t see its impact on us.

"But if we reduce that separation, then we realize that the harm that we are perpetrating by our continued ability to bury problems is going to come back to us. And I think that's what we've been really trying to do here, is change that dynamic."

Combining brutal honesty with unbelievable optimism
"There’s a paradox that has driven a lot of my life’s work. On one hand, we have to be brutally honest about what’s actually happening. We can't delude ourselves as to the actual things that are occurring in our world and in our communities and ourselves right now. There's got to be a level of science and evidence and brutal honesty.

"At the same time there has to be an unbelievable level of optimism and hope. Those two things together can allow us to move forward."

Doing work for one another
"I do believe what’s going to be required is that more of us have to be focused on alleviating the suffering of each other. I don’t think there’s a pathway to greater understanding and awareness without actually doing work for one another.

"One of my favorite phrases is, ‘I've never seen a hearse with a luggage rack.’ We don't get to take any of this with us. All we’re doing is borrowing it. Whose lessons are you taking from those who came before you? Who are you learning from, and what are you doing while you're here, and what are you leaving for the people coming up behind you?

"I think it's so basic. We've gotten away from the basics."

We’re at the ‘risk point’
"Everybody makes a decision at some point whether they’re going to hang in through the conflict, or not. And I think it feels like right now we're at the risk point. The level of disgust is so high that people are not hanging in there with each other through their disagreements. And they’re using that excuse to further disengage or further demonize or further be disgusted with one another, as if the other somehow is the manifestation of all things evil and we're the manifestation of all things good.

"I think we have to reverse that process, because there is nothing there for us. I mean, that is a wasteland.

"I think it's going to take a lot of strong leadership from people. People are going to have to become a much greater version of themselves to get us through this."

"What is out there is part of us. We are not separate from it."

on the Road to DC: Boulder, CO (1)

For some reason we know a lot of people in Boulder, CO. Two of them are Corin and Chris, who invited several friends over for a lovely dinner and a two-hour Pop the Bubble conversation. Some highlights:

On the current state of our American union:

"I’m shocked at the outcome of our presidential election, but at the same time I’m not. Whether we agree with what happened or not, a chunk of this country cried out, and I think regardless of what your beliefs are, there's a reason for it and I think we should listen and find out why."

"I feel like we’re moving into a new moment...something humanity has never experienced before, and I kind of feel like Trump is the neon sign to show us that. We are going somewhere really, really new, which creates confusion and fear, bringing up anger in people because they're scared and don’t know what to do with their feelings."

"I think people are tired of the bullshit, of being lied to. I always try when it comes to politics to hear all perspectives, and what amazes me is how one simple act, one simple truth, is manipulated. People are just sick and tired of being lied to and want honesty. And I think that's what it comes down to. And as ugly as Trump is, there was this kind of brutal honesty about him that people liked."

On what unites us:

"I think we all want to feel like our lives are meaningful."

"Listening. I don’t see unity as a destination, but as a process. The act of listening literally unites us."

"Yearning. Everyone has a yearning for something that’s not fulfilled in their life."

"Longing, or yearning was a word that also came to me. But the longing for what? What is the unifying thing? I think it is a longing for love and connection and reunion."

On the possibility of the moment:

"I was taught that nothing evolves without equal amounts of chaos and order. If there's too much chaos things just disintegrate, and if there's too much order things stagnate and die. So I think it's a time of absolute and necessary chaos. The only way we're going to evolve is if our obsolete patterns and ways of doing things are just smashed. And so I think that's where we're at."

"I would dare say that I’m a religious person. In the Sanctuary of the church that I've been part of it says: "In God, all things are possible." The Unity church here in Boulder talks about God as the 'awareness of the lack of separation.' So embracing God is coming from a place of complete lack of separation. So with an awareness and an attitude that we're totally connected, all things are possible."

On taking responsibility:

"I think it’s so important to not have an attitude of 'us vs. them.' I think our whole culture so based on having an enemy. Yes, there are people who do bad things; they exist. But I think if we truly are all one, which I know on some soul level we absolutely are, then we have to own all of it. We have to own all our history. What is out there is part of us. We are not separate from it."

"I remember when my daughter was little and it would be time to go to school and I would go in and wake her up and she would become really angry with me, and I finally said to her, ‘look, it doesn't become morning because of me!’ We all do that. If there is someone or something we can possibly blame or fight against, we do act like kids! And you know, it's not morning because someone made it morning, it just is morning; and we have to get up.”

“IT’S A WAKE-UP CALL.”

On the Road to DC: Sandy, Utah

Sharon Spaulding is a marketing and communications professional with a passion for helping nonprofits and international NGOs articulate their missions and reach broader audiences about global issues. She’s also associate producer of a recent documentary, “3000 Cups of Tea, Investigating the Rise and Ruin of Greg Mortenson.”

We spoke to her in her home in Sandy, Utah, which she and her husband Carl opened up to us during our travels.

How are you feeling about the state of our country?
“I was very deeply impacted by the election, and to a certain extent I’m still grieving, still in shock over what happened.

“It was not just an affront to everything I hold dear in terms of values, it felt like it really invalidated who I am as a person—everything I stood for and worked for and fought for. It was horrifying on a very deep level.

“I also felt that it was to a certain extent a huge wake up call. How did this happen? What are we going to do? Hillary wasn’t elected, so she isn’t going to handle it, her advisors and her staff and her teams, they are not going to handle the environmental issues, the legal issues, the issues of racism and sexism… we have to do it.

“So one of the things a group of us did was to start a Facebook page. We each took on an issue we felt most passionate about, and when we become aware of petitions or actions or marches, or other things we could do around our area of interest, we post them on Facebook.”

Do you understand the Trump voter’s perspective?
“I have friends who voted for Trump, and I still don’t understand the process by which they arrived at the conclusion that they would be better off.

“I’m not talking about out of work coal miners. I’m talking about people who are well-educated, who are financially secure, who have travelled the world, who have what I would consider to be a broader worldview, who I consider to be humanitarian…all of these things. How did you vote for Donald Trump? Why?

What do you mean, she’s had people killed?

“Their answers have not satisfied my curiosity. One person said, ‘Well how could you vote for Hillary? She’s had people killed.’ And I’m thinking, what do you mean she’s had people killed?

“Others are very concerned about terrorism, and Islamic extremism. But I’m still not quite sure how they arrive at their decision at the end, what was it that had them cast a ballot for him. I don’t know.

“There’s a fundamental lack of agreeing on what the facts are. We used to say that ‘perception is reality’…it’s a great old PR adage. It almost doesn’t even matter what the facts are because we’re so caught up in the realm of ‘I like her/I don’t like her ‘or ‘I like him/I don’t like him’ or ‘well, he doesn’t really mean what he’s saying.’”

Would you agree that our institutions are broken, that most things in our country are not working?
“If I look back over say the last 25 years or 30 years, I think that some things are working and some things are not. I think there’s been enormous progress in terms of human rights issues in the US just in the last 10 years. I mean gay marriage—it’s like it’s time, thank god—and having an African American president.

“I went to a small private high school in downtown Chicago, and I remember vividly when we had our first African American student enter our school. It was a huge deal. Nobody would think twice [today]. So I think there is progress.

“But I think there are other things that are not working. Like all of the police shootings; the number of African American men who are stopped in their cars for doing absolutely nothing. That’s horrible. That is not working. It’s horrible that women still make 70 cents on the dollar. That’s not working. And you look at birth control, planned parenthood, those thing are very much our rights and freedoms, and they are very much at risk.”

What has put them at risk?
“I come back to economics. I think we’ve lost the middle class. The divide between ‘the haves’ and the ‘have nots’ has gotten much bigger. And that’s a huge problem. That’s not sustainable. It’s just not.”

Why has the divide gotten bigger?
“The first thing that comes to my mind is greed. One of the things that we’ve lost sight of as a country is the greater good. We’ve become so fragmented in terms of looking at what’s going to benefit certain segments rather than the good of the whole country.”

Why?
“I think it comes down to a sense of scarcity, which underlies a sense of greed. There’s a sense of well, I don’t want to give up what benefits me. That’s what I heard over and over again.

“The school voucher thing was a huge deal here in Utah a few years back. People would say why should I pay twice? I’m paying for private schools, why should I pay for public schools? And to me that’s the prime example. You pay for public schools because you need an educated population. And a private school is a luxury and option if you can afford it.

There has to be ingrained or instilled or taught or nurtured a concern for the greater good. If there isn’t we’re screwed.

“So I think that’s part of it. I also think that probably our economic system, our engine of consumption, is not sustainable. This idea that we have to keep producing more goods, and we have to keep producing more consumers to buy those goods, it’s not a sustainable model.

“I think we have to get back to some kind of a system that where everyone benefits. They’re has to be a recognition of certain fundamental human rights—a right to good health care, to an education, to food, to those fundamental things.

“There has to be ingrained or instilled or taught or nurtured a concern for the greater good. If there isn’t we’re screwed.”

How do we bridge the divide?
“I don’t know. I really don’t know….My first thought is along the lines of going way back to the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence, the Bill of Rights, and the originating principles.

“There really has to be a set of ideals or standards toward which you strive. It doesn’t mean you get it right from the beginning—I mean, ‘all men are created equal’ but we were a slave nation, how contradictory can you be?—but it doesn’t invalidate the principle, and it doesn’t mean that over time you don’t work toward that goal, and toward making those things right.

“So I go back to things like all men, and women, are created equal; I go to things like separation of church and state, that people need to have religious freedom; I go back to a free press, the first amendment. I go back to some of these core principles.”

Anything else you want to say?
“I think there’s also a great leveling that is happening around the world, where developing countries are coming up, and countries like the US are coming down. Is there going to be loss in that? Yes there is. People are going to lose their right to the gilded palaces kind of thing. And in our country we have to start looking at poverty and illiteracy as though we live in a developing country because to a large extent we do, when you really look at the statistics.

I think there’s a great leveling that is happening around the world.

“In a weird way, I almost think this is the death throes. I mean electing somebody like Donald Trump is like a last gasp. The dragon is fuming, right? It’s that last one burst of energy before it collapses, And it doesn’t have to be a bad thing…I mean the word ‘collapse’ has so many negative connotations, that’s the problem with words like that.”

What’s a better word?
“Maybe regeneration, revitalization, renewal, rebirth. Those are words maybe.”

“WHAT DO YOU REALLY EXPECT FROM YOUR GOVERNMENT?”

On the road to DC: Reno, NV

We met Dave M. at a coffee shop in Reno, Nevada. My cousin introduced us. Friends since elementary school, he and Dave are personally close but politically far apart. So when my cousin heard about the Pop the Bubble Tour, he thought Dave could provide an interesting perspective. He was right.

On his political evolution:
“I was a democrat when I graduated from Cal. Then in ‘76 I voted for Carter. That was the last time I voted for a democrat for president. By 1980 I’m working in aerospace and thinking I’m making all this money at twenty-one thousand bucks a year, and then I get this huge frikkin’ tax bill and I’m thinking like, ‘you gotta be kiddin’ me!’ That was my experience with voting democrat.”

On the current state of political discourse:
“I have never in my life experienced so much polarization so quickly, it’s like you’re either way over here or way over there. And people are really emotional about it. There’s like zero critical thinking.”

“I’ve never seen anything like attacking a president elect before he’s even in office, I mean they’re already talking about impeaching him and he hasn’t even been inaugurated. I’ve never seen anything so hostile.”

“I am so skeptical of everything I hear it’s just ridiculous.”

On the media:
“The media does a terrible job of it.  I used to listen to NPR all the time and now it’s like, wow, can you guys at least try to be objective a little bit?  I can hear the snears, and the aggressions when they talk about Trump and this and that…at least try to sound objective about stuff. It’s just the constant little jabs.”

On immigration
“With immigration reform, I’d love to see the low hanging fruit first. I happen to think we should toss out all our criminal aliens. I don’t see any reason to keep them here. You protect the border, I don’t know if that’s a wall or fence or whatever. I’d like to see a secure border. I don’t like seeing a lot of these middle eastern guys pretending they’re from Central America sneaking in, and who knows what they’re up to.

“We should have an immigration policy where we can encourage the best and the brightest to come here. I think we have that right.”

On Trump
“With Trump, he’s so unusual. I mean, there was a dozen times during this campaign when you thought, ‘oh he just blew his chances, he’s done.’ And then somehow he recovers. I went through that cycle multiple times as I think most people did. And somehow he still resonated with his basic messages.

“He’s so different, it’s almost like you just gotta wait and see what he does instead of what he says…he’s bombastic and used to being in charge and he’s already running into some resistance from his own house and senate, cause he’s not their boss, and he’s gonna have to realize that it’s three branches of government not one, you’re not king.

“So I like the fact that he’s shaken things up because our government definitely needs to be shaken up. Whether it gets shaken up and results in something better remains to be seen, but I’m totally comfortable with waiting to see what happens. He’s not going to go blow up Moscow or something.

“Now that I understand the Trump bravado and belligerence, when it settles down it’s not that far from what I want.”

One question you want people to think about:
“What do you really expect from your government? Do you really expect your government to take care of you? So you don’t have to work? Do you really expect a guaranteed basic income, where everyone gets a certain amount of money for doing nothing? Is that the country you really want to live in?”

On finding common ground
“I think we have been [finding it], and more so in the last ten years than I can recall in my entire life. My view of gay marriage 10 years ago was 180 degrees from where it is today. Gay people are not bad, it’s the hand they got dealt…there’s no undoing that. I don’t blame them for being gay. And you know, then you meet some gay people, and you interact with them, and it’s like, ‘there’s nothing wrong with these people.'”

On Popping Bubbles
“Culturally, we’re spending so much time behind screens and not interacting… There’s a relatively small percentage of our society that really interacts anymore. And you’ve got all these groups of like-minded people and they tend to polarize.

“One area where you can break through those bubbles: I’ve got this group I joined, it’s a mountain biking group, a Tuesday night ride group that has like 400 members, and the only prerequisite is that you like mountain biking. So you get all kinds of views all over the place. So that cuts across all the sectors.”

“this election has made me very courageous.”

On the road to DC: Sacramento, CA

Our first stop of the Pop the Bubble Conversation Tour. Hosts Kate Karpillow and Steve Sanders brought together six young professionals working on various social issues ranging from education to the environment to local sex trafficking. Five were Latino, one who immigrated when she was five. Another came to this country ten years ago from Nairobi, and now works for an assemblyman in the state capital.

When asked how they were feeling about the current state of our union, “angry” and “fearful” were common responses, but so were were statements of hope and optimism, underscored by a sense of personal responsibility. Some quotes:

“I’m hoping to get to the place where I can say that I’m hopeful. But I’m also excited… because I’ve been forced to ask myself a lot of questions, and I’ve also seen other people ask more questions than they’ve ever asked in their lives. So I’m hopeful, but I haven’t yet seen what those questions are going to bring those people to next…how it will translate to action.”

“I used to say it would have been nice to live in the 60s because of all the political activism, and I think now the pendulum has swung, where we might see that level of activism now.”

“This election has made me very courageous. The day of the election I had so much fear, but then I realized no, I’m going to take that fear off myself, and one of the things I’m going to do is continue to bet on myself. Be a better leader, a better person.”

At one point in the conversation we proposed that one thing most liberals and conservatives can agree on is that the system is broken. We may disagree in how and why, but we share the sense that things are not working as they should.

I introduced the model of an iceberg. At the tip, above the surface, we put all the signs that things are not working. We then looked deeper below the surface, at the context out of which these problems arise. That context we labeled “culture,”and explored what it is about our culture that produces these kinds of problems.

Excessive individualism was one answer.

“We’ve forgotten that embedded in our culture is a communitarian impulse…it’s ‘we the people’ not ‘a bunch of us guys.’ We’ve lost the idea that there are dualities, and mutual responsibilities.”

“We’ve lost the notion that individual liberty within commonwealth is what works. We’ve lost the common wealth.”

Excessive materialism was another factor.

“You read the NY Times Magazine on Sunday and it’s about poverty, and then you look at the ads and it’s about $10,000 diamond bracelets. It’s just such a weird disconnect.”

We then introduced the idea from cultural anthropology—that all cultures rest on a story that answers three questions: Who am I, why am I here, and what am I to do. I asked how they thought our culture answered those questions. Said one:

“When I think of the American story I think that who we are is the ‘I’, (separate from others).Why am I here? To work hard. What am I to do? Be successful…but at the expense of my mental health, at the expense of my physical health, at the expense of my community, and at the expense of my resources.”

And finally this comment:

“I think the answer to those questions has to do with how we understand what it means to be successful, to have an impact. I’m thinking back to a birthday party I just went to. A Korean/American first year birthday party. And they laid out this blanket of gifts for this one-year-old child, each symbolizing his possible future. The grandparents said “take the money!” The mom, who’s very materialistic, said “take the camera, be a movie star” and then I’m standing there with my own preconceptions of what success means and I’m saying “take the book, take the book!” This idea of what do we do, who we are, our impact, is determined by our culture.”